Back To School--Nutrition tips

Okay, first of all, my apologies that it's been forever since I've written on here!

Remember how I once mentioned I would post more with wellness tips? I just wrote up another one--this time on nutrition. Here are my tips to make fitting in healthy meals and snacks/other tips a lot easier each day...

1. Pack up snacks and meals the night before

With the school year starting again, it can be hard to not know how to pack your lunches or snacks, let alone how to have them be as healthy as possible. I know while at college, I swear almost every student I see either 1. eats out for lunch or 2. does not eat(/forgets they should eat) 3. Only eats snack foods. With my big appetite, my CF causing me to need more nutrients, and small budget, this is all a no-go. I've found that packing the night before makes it so much easier. (Time after time again I have roommates or guests ask me what I'm making for dinner--to respond I'm packing a lunch.) With that being said, I found a way to make packing a lot easier. I am also big about trying to keep up with nutrients through easy, convenient ways. I know there's a lot of ways you can go about packing lunches, but this has worked best for me and I oftentimes get asked where to find them...

Note: I was NOT asked by this brand to promote these products--this is solely personally discovering it and using it because it's helped packing lunches be a lot easier and better.

One day while browsing the magical world of Target, I came across this brand Systema. (I have also seen them at places like TJMaxx and I know they would also be online.) I tried these out for the first time a couple semesters ago and I have loved them ever since! I am being 100% honest when I say I use them ALL the time for about everything!! 

Note that this parfait one isn't Systema brand, but it was at Target and is awesome! (fruit and yogurt in the bottom, granola on top. I am also going to use it for milk and cereal to bring breakfast on the go.)

Here is an idea of what to put inside one:

Chicken Cesar salad and cantaloupe (I had the dressing in its own container) and also had croutons with it and a granola bar on the side.

What is so great about these is they have their own compartments for everything--no more Ziploc bags!! You can put your veggies in there with its own place for dip, you can have your own salad dressing containers, and so on. They have everything from salad containers to put your toppings on the top of the lid (i.e. fruit, cheese, nuts, whatever you desire) so the rest of the salad doesn't get soggy, a sandwich lunchbox to put your bread and meat in one compartment and your tomatoes or avocado in another so the whole sandwich doesn't get soggy when you pack it...the ideas are limitless. 

Take my word for it when I say these have helped a buttload to cut back on Ziploc baggies and make packing lunches a lot easier/a lot more flexible. I pack my food the night before and bring it to my classes and/or work the next day.

2. Bring a water bottle. Always.
Don't like water? There are options.

Those who know me well know I always have to carry around water with me. Needless to say it's easier to drink more when you have it right there in front of you.

While working at my internship, one of the most common complaints I heard from those who drink more sugared beverages (i.e. soda), they don't like drinking water, because it has no taste. I personally love just drinking water, but I know that people have different preferences and cravings. I know some people like the Crystallite packets, but here is another option...

For some people, this may be a helpful option to be motivated to drink more water--a fruit infuser water bottle which has a separate compartment for whichever fruit or herbs you decide to put in but allows the pulp to diffuse into the water. It tastes great! I know this may not be necessary for everyone, but it is an idea if you want to find a way to make it easier to drink more water--plus to get some extra vitamins in while you're drinking.

3. (Homemade) freezer meals 
Don't have time to cook during the week? Try preparing meals one day a week (Sunday works best for me) that you can freeze beforehand. Then, all you have to do is pop the meal in the microwave or conventional oven. Some of my favorite recipes include:
Breakfast burritos
Slow Cooker mango chicken
and the variety of Stir Fry's you can do
(Here is a list of foods you can freeze so they last longer!

If YOU have any ideas that you swear by to make food prep easier and staying healthier in the school year, comment below or send them over! I'd love to hear more!



P.S. I promise I'll be better about writing on here more often!! (Even though I always say that, I really do mean it.)

There's No Place Like Home

It still feels surreal to be home. As I settle back into my responsibilities and at my new house, there are times where I feel as if I am limbo and have to remind myself it's all real. Honestly, I am still healing emotionally and mentally from this recent hospital tune-up. As part of CF awareness month, CF can sure take a toll on us, and this time, probably more than ever or at least in a long time, I learned how draining it can be. As a heads up, this post is a little more thorough about why it can all be overwhelming for us with CF. Through it all, though, I found some ways to get by and pick my spirits up and learned some irreplaceable lessons (some too personal to share on here.) I still don't know all the answers, but everything has seemed to slow down since being home.

Just a few days ago, I returned home from another tune-up at the joint. Once finals were completed and I was moving, I could feel myself in the health danger zone, and then once settled in, my health crashed with once again body aches, nausea, and more. Before I knew it, it was time for my last check up from the last time (about a month ago) when I was very ill. I was unsure what was about to come up, yet had that pit in my stomach that knew I was going in. As instructed by my nurse beforehand, I packed up my bags, and then my bestie Kelly joined me for the trip to the hospital for the check up and a possible admission, which I was SO thankful for!

Everything happened so quickly--check up, then pfts--which plummeted to their lowest in a long time--got the news, got a room, then was on my way to IR for the PICC line placement. In all honesty, I was SO tired from the previous week, being ill, and then packing that a few people already thought I was on drugs! I'll say the sedation went much more smoothly since I was already half asleep as they wheeled me out! It must have been a miracle so I was less anxious before being put under.

Waiting time for PFTS. 

What going to IR looks like. Trust me when I say I was so dead tired and felt drugged. I couldn't even sign my name in a  straight line on the paperwork! HA!

The rest of of the tune up was filled with the usual--4 treatments a day with a respiratory therapist, triple the amount of medications, blood sugar draws before and after meals during the first few days and more blood draws, many visits by all sorts of practitioners and always being hooked up to an IV bag...it took a few days to start feeling back to my normal self, and then to surprise the nurses with all the energy showing ;) I will also bring up that a CF tune up is intense of itself to the point it can be difficult to find time or the ability to actually rest! I was not allowed to leave my room for the first couple days once the viral test came back positive with Type B Flu, then allowed to go in the hallways but forbidden to go to places with a lot of people (i.e. the cafeteria and church on Sunday.) I had to search for ways to be creative to get by. I found some new ways to make it all bearable--like bringing my hammock outside and finding a courtyard to hang it up at to get a break, discovered new exercises to do in my room, found ways to "cook" by combining ingredients at home with some salad bar ingredients from downstairs...ha it was an experience.

If you know me, you know I do not like the hospital beds! They are designed to move around on their own to prevent people from getting gout, which I wouldn't need to worry about! I'm talking one leg will be above the other, or one side tilted...all making me feel claustrophobic!! I remembered these beds from last time (you cannot forget them when you deflate them and sleep on a solid "hospital bed frame" for 13 nights) decided to find a way to hang up my hammock if they still had those darn beds. Well, here was the result of trying the hammock out! Ha! It ended up feeling awkward.The nurse was amazing and found me a cot to set up, and then I was able to set my hammock up outside! It was a win!

One set of pills

To give you an idea of the hospital food at times--when you ask for French toast....I learned that they give you one slice with nothing on it, with a possibility of some extra toastiness on the edges. ;) Ha I know I can be such a stinker when it comes to wanting good food, especially since I cook at home!

Which leads to how I was able to find some ways to find the good healthy food!  

As time progressed I had some surprises--or complications I should say. Admittedly, it was a very difficult 10 days as complications picked up with my PICC line, which led to it the arm becoming so swollen and painful that it needed to be pulled. I then had the ultrasound crew place an IV in the other arm, which thus led to more complications in that arm with once again pain and swelling--to the point where both arms could hardly move and felt as if a bullet went through both or had both arms broken. I don't think I had been in that much physical pain in such a short time period in a long time. It was emotionally and mentally draining, as other complications picked up as well, from intestinal pain that had me curled up--followed by numbness and tingling (had to have an EKG done--luckily no serious problems with that), to what must have been the worst migraine in my life. With all that happened, I ended up in many meltdowns. When I say this, I am talking ugly tears and trembling. I was forbidden to leave my room at times and was not allowed as much freedom this tune-up since I was admitted with the flu. There were frustrations which built up and then led to emotional numbness.

This last week, I remember being there, with bruises running up and down my arms (which are still there for the most part), with some portions bulging out, all swelled up from IVs. To say I was mentally and emotionally depleted was an understatement. I wept many tears that week--tears from physical pain, confusion, and disappointment. The day that would decide whether I would go home or not was one of those days. I went to do PFTs, a little nervous but confident they would go up a lot since I felt well. First blast--they were just about the same as when I came in. I wondered how, as I blew another. Same. Again and again--went up a few notches as my highest, a number which would make me shudder on any given day. I tried again and again--the most tries I have ever given in my life--as nervous and confused as could be. I was determined, but felt I lost a fight.
When it was all done, I had never been so nervous to hear from the doctor as I paced my room. I had it. I was done with almost consistent pain. Done with complications arising. Just done.

Post- PICC line removal (the bruises looked worse in person.)

They left the decision to me for whether I should go home or not, which left me heaped in a wreck. I felt healthy, but why were my numbers where they were? I was so tired of being in pain and also did not want to over expose myself to germs, but if I went home, would that mean I was quitting? What was the best decision? After some time, I knew I needed some help. I paged my social worker/counselor. She came shortly after. We talked it all through because as much as I pleaded to God, I did not receive an answer, and it was more than frustrating. She reminded me how at times we are to act by making a decision, then see how we feel about it. She had me silently make a decision, then left me a half hour to myself.

As she started to leave, I thanked her for accepting my page through the nurse to have her come over. She admitted she did not have her pager on her, but saw my PFTs and had the thought she should check up on me, then to find me on my couch in a hot mess. We looked at each other as she was about to leave, amazed as we agreed that our pages always go through.

I decided to come home, and felt peace. It was still difficult, and the emotional weight was still there. From it all, I have come to learn the importance of healing. Some things take time, as some things are not answered in the ways we expect, and memories remain vivid. Since I have been home, I have found time to do some of the things I love most--even the little things--from jumping on the trampoline, taking time to read a book, baking, running (I still had to hold my swollen arm still beside me), shopping, and spending time with friends and family. I still cannot do everything I would like to as my body is still healing, but I am appreciating what I can. Everything around me appears more vivid and green. My gratitude has been increased as the pain subsides and antibiotics are miraculously (even if they are slowly) doing their job. Sometimes the storms in our lives come and go, but as I did during my time at the joint, we can see God's hands through His tender mercies.

It may seem crazy to some during all the turmoil to feel the Lord's love, but I sure did. I learned more about Christ's compassion, His empathy, as He experienced it all. I honestly cannot pinpoint what I learned the most during this trying time, but I can say that I felt God's love in the darkest of times.

Hold on when times are dark, because then the light will seem brighter. Hold onto God's love and trust in His plan. Healing takes time, even when we feel we cannot do it all.

"Cheer up your hearts, and remember that ye are free to act for yourselves."-2 Ne 10:23 (the scripture that came up when I flipped them open while trying to decide whether or not I should go home.)

"Hold on. Hope on. Fan the flame of your faith, for all things are possible to them that believe."-Elder Jeffrey R. Holland

Also, I HAVE to say THANK YOU to my family and friends who reached out, as well as the random acts of kindness that were given by strangers and some physicians. I could not have done it without you!!

My mom couldn't come in when I was sick since she has elderly clients she works with for her job so it was too risky, but she brought by some of the most beautiful flowers and blackberries! Moms just know what to do. And don't worry, she was able to come by again later when I felt better.

So grateful for these ladies! Also, everyone who came in was pre-cautioned since they thought I still had the flu when the symptoms were no longer there (emoji  looking up at the ceiling) so everyone who came in wore a mask and /or a blue gown and gloves.

One guy whose wife has/had? :( CF ordered all the CF patients pizza from Pie Pizzeria!! He took our orders and I chose Hawaiian. It made such a difference to have good food, and it helped me feel better!

Let's please cure CF, shall we? ;)

What we don't talk about enough

I decided to write about something that's been on my mind. As many of you have most likely also seen, there is an increasing amount of blog posts and articles about what is becoming more noticeable, particularly about our church's culture--all dealing with issues regarding the growing shame culture, feelings of being excluded, being offended, and how doctrine can be overlooked with cultural aspects that have grown.

With all of this in mind, I understand that these issues are growing. However, I do believe that we find what we look for. As these issues are increasing it can be so easy to change our focus on what is changing negatively.

With all of these topics on the rise, you know what I noticed I don't see written about enough?

The good that STILL exists

Sure, at this point, you may call me oblivious or a "Pollyanna" (for those of you who don't know what that means, Pollyanna is a movie about a girl who looked at the bright side of all things.) You could also call this the opposite of being a "realist."

Let me share with you an experience that demonstrates the point I am trying to get across...

A couple years ago (as I easily get sick with my Cystic Fibrosis) I got sick. I almost ended up in the hospital for a tune-up as the amount of sputum increased and my lung function went down. However, I was lucky enough blessed to have the antibiotics slowly kick in and work, thus improving my health. When I finally had the energy to stand, I was thrilled to go to the temple, as I had been longing to go. I was looking forward to feeling that still peace and feeling close to the Lord. I got ready and headed over.

While there, my cough was still there, but I knew it would not be contagious since I was on antibiotics. While I was there, I ran into a sister from my mission, who I didn't know too well but had seen her around town. As background info, the Packard's made us swear to all look out for one another, as we were the "MBM family." Even if we didn't know each other well from the mission, we were to keep in touch and help each other out. This sister knew a little bit about my CF, as President Packard brought it up every now and then to the mission. While quietly sitting there in the temple, after briefly catching up with this sister, I heard her talking to another lady who came to the temple. My cough was loud and sounded awful, and she took note as I heard something along the lines of, "Why is that sister here? She is going to get us all sick!" 

My heart dropped. To say I felt awful is not enough. I was too ill for a while to come, but now well enough where I could come to feel peace and God's love in my life. I didn't feel welcome right then.

This dear sister from my mission said in reply, "She is okay. She has a medical condition that causes her to cough, and it's not contagious..."

I felt at ease. I was about moved to tears of gratitude. Here was someone who stood up for me, even when we did not know each other too well. 

After the negative comment was made, I could have dwelled on these thoughts, feeling excluded and offended, wondering why members of the church--people who were trying to become more like Christ--could say such a thing and exclude people--even like me who could not help being sick and felt excluded enough plenty of times due to my cough and series of illnesses. However, something so simple happened--something that made my spirit feel lifted and assured, as this sister stood up for me. 

My point here is, I feel there is not enough focus on the members of the LDS church who do stand for those who struggle--even those who feel excluded, belittled, or betrayed. It can be so easy to focus on what is going downhill and how culture can take over. However, if we shift our focus to the service that is rendered, the love that is shown, and how individuals reach out to show compassion, then we may be surprised to how much more these positive qualities are in greater abundance. I have seen friends struggle with their feelings of a change in culture, feeling excluded or put down, becoming less involved in the church because of dwelling on these negative aspects of church culture and offenses taken against them. I am not denying these experiences that many have, but I am trying to express how when we look for the good, we will find the good.

After all, the Savior said as part of His conclusion during His Sermon on the Mount:

"Ask of God, and it shall be given you. Seek, and ye shall find. Knock, and it shall be opened unto you. 

For everyone that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened." 

I underlined the point I wish to emphasize--that what we seek we will find. I believe that if we seek for the good, as I chose to do that time in the temple, then we will find it, and will feel more inclined to help others as there are always those who devote their time to reach out and help. If we search for these people and their acts of goodness, and also focus our actions on doing good, we will see more good in the world, even within the church.

When Life Doesn't Go as Planned (It's all going to be okay!)

It's been a while since I've kept up with the blog, but I promise I will do better this summer!
I am halfway done with finals and I am honestly very ready for this semester to be over. (Anyone else also feeling it?) Perhaps Senioritis is starting to creep its way in ;)

You know those times where life throws things at you you did not plan and things get crazy? Ha well I had a good share of those times lately, but I was able to get through them regardless.
Overall, I enjoyed my classes, and they were very worthwhile, and I've also had some amazing experiences! It has definitely all been one for the ride.

To give you an idea, this semester was full of:

-Many assignments, one-on-ones with TAs, papers, quizzes, personal and group projects, book reports, and exams.

-A few unplanned CF clinic visits--and an average of at least one visit to see a variety of some doctors and specialists that I cannot even remember them all (eye, dentist, periodontist, etc) almost every week.

-Two trips to the ER

-Doing things that make me nervous, with some regrets but mostly feeling accomplished.

-Many mock interviews and resume reviews, all leading up to getting my dream internship position as a Worksite Wellness Coordinator to help start a program! (It's seriously the best job ever.)

-Trips back and forth for my internship.

-Many peanut butter sandwiches and Costco meals with little time to prepare food.

-Learning more how to do adult things like how to invest, calculate taxes, make car and house payments, and the like. The struggle is still oh so real when it comes to me doing math and it sure tests my patience, but I have still been so glad for the things I have learned.

-Watching my posture with what I am learning in my functional fitness class, to make sure I don't become an even more petite old woman (/have a haunched back, back and neck aches, etc) one day.

-New adventures made and new dreams envisioned

-Meeting incredible people and then being inspired by them.

-Figuring out new tactics to not let CF get in the way, and then having some of the best of times!

-Crying tears of joy while watching the new Beauty and the Beast both times (and discovering that Emma Watson's version of Belle is pretty much the carbon-copy of my personality.)

-Persuading my CF doctor with my own game plan to not admit me into the hospital right before finals for a tune up, right there with all my bags packed and ready to be admitted. I had never felt so relieved and motivated to push myself to get my numbers back up once I regained most of my strength.
-Seeing lives literally be saved while at my internship as people have been changing their health habits. It's truly been remarkable. There's still been hurdles to get over and challenges to solve, with new ideas to create. It's all part of the work, and it ends up being so rewarding!

This semester has helped me learn how to accept that sometimes hard things happen one after the other, and it's all part of the journey. Even more so, there are still so many good things happening. Sometimes life gets so crazy and things happen we do NOT plan, doors close, and we can become confused when things don't go as planned. And also, great things happen that we did not plan! Nevertheless, when you wonder why things happen, remember it's all okay, because it's all going to be okay. My Family Finance teacher has a motto--When life doesn't go as planned, don't get frustrated, make the best of it! I have to remind myself this at times, and I am sure many of us do! That's when we can catch our breath and tell ourselves that we can do it. We can find joy in the small things by finding time to do what we love and take things one step at a time.

Now, here are some little highlights of the good things!

 

I was able to meet incredible people like Stephanie Nielsen this semester! A couple months after I heard her speak I ran into her at the nearby grocery store, and we had a nice short conversation. I don't think she remembered me since she meets so many people at her devotionals, but it was sure inspiring to meet and interact with her for a bit!

 This was on the first day of my internship!! It's been one of the greatest blessings in my life!! I am so grateful I have found a career path that I LOVE and feel so passionate about!!

 This is the view every time I go to my internship meetings!!

Also, seeing the beautiful flowers each time I am in Salt Lake is a great bonus! I mean, look at them!!

Also, back in March I went with some new friends down to Moab. It sure "rock"ed.

Also, I recently bought a hammock and it has been one of the BEST purchases ever!! Bear Butt sells great-quality two-person hammocks for very decent prices.

Nevertheless, I am so grateful for some of the best of friends. My best friend Kelly has been an angel and has been there through everything. We have also had our good amount of laughs, even to the point where people think we're weird! The best part? We don't even care at all! Ha! I think everyone should have a friend like her.

I am so glad this semester is done to have some new starts and to put the craziness in the past, and I look forward to what's ahead. Only two more finals to go this week! Let's do this.

Stress Management Tips & Ideas

Ladies and gents, I feel like all of us here have our moments of stress. I feel like managing stress is a frequent effort, and I am sure may readers here can relate. There seems to be a never-ending amount of homework and quizzes and tests to study for, assignments to do, readings to catch up on, internships to apply for, treatments, doctors appointments...you get the picture...

I have come to learn in one of my classes that stress management is one of the toughest thing for many Americans. We live in a culture where we are always rushed and on-the-go, with high demands and due dates. It can be dangerous, as it can put a lot of pressure on our cardiovascular systems and wear down our energy! In order to manage stress, pretty much all that I learned up to this point were the "deep, diaphragm breathing/relaxation" techniques. Kudos to all who teach this, as it works a lot of times, but there are those times where I feel like I've heard to do this so many times as I wonder, (ha, even those times with CF when it's not the easiest thing), "Well, what if I go back to not breathing well?!" If you want relaxation recordings, BYU has some here: https://biofeedback.byu.edu/?q=relaxation-recordings

However, if you are like me and want additional tips, here are some I came across recently while reading a research article about stress management:

Additional ways to reduce stress:

-Move more

-Eat well

-Sleep well

-Set goals, focusing on this acronym:

T. = Time. Take a time-out (25-30 minutes or whatever you feel works for you) to process the thought/feeling that you feel wound up in.

A. = Activity. Take a time out to work on an activity, even if it's a short walk, work on a hobby, call a friend, etc.

D. = Distance. Distance yourself from the stressor/what you run to that may not be healthy when you are stressed (i.e. food if you may overeat.) Take some time to go to a place that is less stressful. 

-Journal

-Gratitude reflection.

-Exercise

-Find humor! Watch a quick funny video or do something funny. This always helps me! 

-Reflect on your values

Practice P.A.U.S.E. (I personally fell in love with this idea right as I read it. I find great relief coming from being more aware of our surroundings and enjoying the small things.)

Practice

Awareness

Understand

Savor

Enjoy

For more info on this study/article, click here:

http://content.ebscohost.com.erl.lib.byu.edu/ContentServer.asp?EbscoContent=dGJyMNHr7ESep7A4xNvgOLCmr0%2BeqK9Srqa4SrCWxWXS&ContentCustomer=dGJyMPGuskyurK5IuePfgeyx43zx1%2BqE&T=P&P=AN&S=R&D=aph&K=95323251

Hopefully something here can help you out next time you feel overwhelmed! 

And (some) things added to a personal list...

-temple trips

-Jimmy Fallon videos

-Funny youtube/vine videos

-Time with my good friends Ben & Jerry

-Tillamook ice cream--they have the BEST strawberry ice cream. If you try to be good friends with me we are technically not good friends until you try it.

-Snapchat filters

-hiking

-Insanity workouts

-taking naps

-reading (books of choice)

(A couple of pictures hidden in my photo album from a couple times while stopping to enjoy some of the little things.) 

Have any further ideas/tactics you have for managing stress? Send them over!!

Looking Back to Move Forward

One month ago...it's crazy to think about how far along I've come this last month.

To say I was ill is an understatement. It's bizarre to think about the illnesses that can knock those of us with CF down to the ground, and somehow we are able to make it back up--even if it is very, very slowly.

Two days after Christmas, I came down with what started with some of the worst intestinal pain I had experienced, which lasted through the night and then progressed to cold symptoms the next morning. After this--aches all over and pain all over. I could hardly move, was exhausted, nauseous, weak, with a dead voice, sore throat, and could feel the pain running from my head to toes, with fevers and sweats and dehydration. A couple days later, on Thursday, I broke out in an unusual rash all over my body, which sent me to the urgent care. The doctor tested me for the flu, and surely enough it came back positive. At this point, with all that was going on, I was absolutely desperate, and the doctor was worried that it would progress to my lungs and could lead to an exacerbation. They left a message for pulmonology department at the U of U to see if an admission would be a good option at this point. They took some chest x-rays, and as the x-ray technician had me stand there with my arms up, I pleaded inside me as it took every ounce of energy away just to stand there for 2 minutes, as the pain all over my body increased and I sure fought back from breaking down into tears. They sent me home with a prescription for Tamiflu, which my insurance rejected since they created a new rule you could only have it every six months, and I already reached that. (That should give you a good idea why my swear word is insurance.)

      Surely enough, I woke up the next morning, feeling the crackling in my lungs and the taste of the buildup that was starting in my airways. My airways tightened up and stung and every breath, which led to a coughing fit, leading me to gasp for more air. More and then eventually darker sputum, and every step my foot took as I placed one in front of the other felt like a workout. Even the required steps to walk to the kitchen to take medications was a workout. For the first time ever, my doctor called me, which is usually left for my nurse to do. She expressed her concern and I was soon put on oral antibiotics. Over that weekend, more coughing fits where I couldn't stop, with the sight I had never seen before--yes, blood (luckily it was in small amounts). And on top of that, purple splotches on some patches of skin near my shoulder signifying I popped some vessels from all the coughing. To add to this, I didn't even want to put on my Vest, and that was the first time I had ever gone a week without it since it hurt too much with the pain all over (thankfully I figured out the alternative for how to do the nebulizers WITH the Pep devise!!)

I remember lying there on the couch, not sure what to do--wanting to take my mind off of it all by watching comedy but then being afraid of laughing since it hurt. Every coughing fit zapped my energy with everything else on top of it. I was hoping that these oral antibiotics would work, as I was on 3. I don't know how it all happened, but after about a week, things started to feel better. The coughing fits were the last to remain, but progress was progress. I remember going into the U of U, wondering what was to happen next, but since even a slight amount of progress was a good sign, I was to keep doing orals. After a week or so, the bruising from the coughing fits began to disappear, with less mucus and less nausea to eventually being able to eat solid food again. I kept up doing more treatments and taking the antibiotics. It was an absolute miracle that once again, the orals were working.

The time for recovery felt long--at least several weeks. Yes, I had the flu shot, and this is not to say flu shots don't matter, but instead I happened to catch another strand of flu that progressed to everything else with CF. Now, I look back. Over the past couple weeks, I have been able to not only walk again, but run and dance. I am able to eat full meals. I have not ended up in coughing fits for about 2 weeks. My human body never seizes to amaze me, as it comes out of some hard of the hardest, most excruciating illnesses time and time again.

Sometimes I don't know why I go through some things, as God tells me it's to help prepare me for future dreams and ambitions (I had never been more than willing to be patient for those things to come after this ;) ). Sometimes I wonder why things happen, but when I look back I am much more appreciative for the smallest things--even in this case, being able to place one foot in front of the other without pain. I think back to what God has helped me get through. It's comforting to know my Savior completely understands it all, as He felt it all.

This weekend, I had the sweet privilege of attending a phenomenal leadership conference at BYU. One of the quotes referenced was given by Steve Jobs, as he said, "You cannot connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backward..." When I heard this, it made sense. By looking back, I was able to see how far I had come, which gave me more motivation and enabling power to move forward.

It's truly a wonder when we look back and are able to think, "Wow...I did that." Because yes, you sure did, so never forget it.

2016

As 2016 comes to a close, I have pondered and tried to figure out what I learned the most. This year was amazing. I was able to travel the most I ever have--from London to throughout England and Scotland and Paris, to New York City. I made new friends, creating relationships and having experiences I shall never forget. I learned a lot, and I will treasure my Travel Journal with the lists of the lessons I learned at each place.

Overall, I think back to a line in a blessing given before I left for London, a few days before I was to leave, as I was terrified I wouldn't be able to go when I broke my foot. Much of what was said didn't make much sense, but Oh! There was so much that was said to prepare me for not only the study abroad, but the rest of the year.  It was so beautiful and it was filled with revelation and wonder, I feel this line seems to well-conclude this year, "Everything we expect ends up being different, and far better and greater than we can fathom, as we remain obedient and serve by doing the greatest good we can." (Close quote.)

I learned in London how to give back a little more, paying it forward, as I was able to miraculously travel around England, Paris, and Scotland with hardly any pain. Fast forward to a few months later, I faced one of the hardest, most trying times of my life. Surely, this counsel, Everything we expect ends up being different...was as true as it could be. I had dreams that I felt were crushed. I felt so alone and confused and hurt, with little motivation to do the things I knew I needed to do. However, I remained obedient by doing the things I knew I had to do to take care of my health. And, more than anything, I knew that one of the only ways I could fully heal was to extend my care and help to others. So, I took the baby steps, and before I knew it I was submerged into what I hadn't seen myself doing--helping coordinate the university's food drive, extending myself through an online internship to people who were suffering, planning more service events for next year...

Sure, at times I felt I was going overboard and it took some time to figure out the right pace. After seeing the service rendered, it felt rewarding to see others have their basic needs met. I felt I was helping hasten the Lord's work. The pain was still there inside me, and I realized it would take time to heal, but these experiences shaped me to have more open eyes and a more open heart, with a drive and willingness to go to work to help Heavenly Father's sons and daughters.

I know the certificates make us look like we were showing off, but it's the only one I have of all of the Food Drive Team. Not to mention they were for goofy things--such as mine for "Most likely to jump in a pile of leaves."

"Everything ends up being different, and far better..." I still cannot fully concur to this, as I haven't seen all the ways things are "far better," than they were before, as I felt I had it all before, but then lost it. Yet, I can say this--I most likely wouldn't have been involved in what I was doing had I not been through that very tough experience. As I have been assured things will be "far better," this is where faith comes in, as I have had to hold onto it. As President Monson once declared to the world, "The future is as bright as your faith."

I also discovered this became a year of healing--from experiences in my past and as hardships happened, all with the hospital tune-up at the beginning of the year to the opportunities that lied ahead. The Lord was so merciful to provide the experiences and people in my life to help me feel set free, living a rich life. I felt He wanted me to live each day to its fullest, and while doing so, I was transformed a little more. The Atonement has become more real, as I have come closer to the Savior. Healing has come through having fun (and many spontaneous dance parties), serving others and being moved to show even more compassion and reach out to my fullest capacity, from my experiences in the hospital to breaking one of my metatarsals in my foot, and going through the Holocaust exhibit in London and the 9/11 Memorial Museum in New York City. I can say that from all that I saw, witnessed, and felt, I did the greatest good I could, and I am determined to continue to do so. And then, as I continue in faith, I know that things will be "Far greater than I can fathom."

2016--you were SO great and good to me. I am so thankful for all the Lord provided!!